Dating as a single parent sounds impossible at times and not every person who raises kids alone can see perspectives in it. However, you should because the process is not too different from the one you used to have before when being single.
Children are not an obstacle to dating, and you do not give up on yourself if you are a single parent. Do not be afraid of ladies who have kids also. They are the same passionate women
who want to love and be loved.
Below, you will find out everything about single parent dating: how to use dating sites, and what things to consider when choosing your new partner.
Consider online dating
When you are a single parent, you hardly find time for yourself while you need to spend more time with your child or children, take care not only of yourself and bear all the responsibilities, especially, if you have nobody to help.
Thus, going out and just meeting new people is not always possible, unless your work supposes that. It means that you should search for alternatives. Dating sites
for single parents are a great option for you in that case.
You do not need to spend much time using the site and the process isn’t very time-consuming. While your kid is doing homework, you can sign up for one of the free single parent dating sites and see how everything works.
If your goal is to find someone really serious, a free site for single parent dating will hardly offer that. It is good just to check what online dating is like and if it suits you at all. But a paid dating service will surely offer the profiles of really interested candidates.
Before throwing yourself at every dating site, remember how many scammers there are, especially those using various cheap dating apps and free services. As a rule, nine of ten profiles on such sites are fake. Therefore, it is better to join verified and reliable providers.
Red flags to recognize when starting dating again
Now as you are not alone in this world and have your wonderful babies to look after, you cannot think of arranging your personal life only. You have to take into account how they feel and whether they are happy. Single parents cannot afford happiness while their children feel miserable.
This is not to say that you should not think of seeing someone and arranging your life again. It only means that you should pick the partner who does not only make you happy but your children as well. You shouldn’t be too cautious with each potential partner. But thinking about your kids’ interests is a must.
Unfortunately, some people who seem to be perfect for you in many aspects may not get along well with your kids. You cannot simply ignore this fact and since the happiness and feelings of your kids are your priorities, it is better to end such relationships if nothing helps.
Here are the biggest red flags to pay attention to when starting a relationship as a single parent. Try not to ignore them and consider before rushing into things too quickly. Never forget that you are responsible for your children’s well-being also.
Ignoring your children
Some people believe children are an unnecessary burden and if you suspect your crush to think so, run away the soonest. Dating as a single parent is always possible and there is no need to think you will never find anyone better. You will if it is your goal.
Although your crush may not say such terrible things directly, neglecting may be expressed in such actions as:
- switching the topic once you refer to your kids;
- calling you at night or early morning and asking you to go out;
- simply lose sight of you having children.
The person who has no kids might not get used to the fact that you are not always free at once but eventually, he or she will do it and start considering the time of calls, dates, etc. However, if someone keeps doing it constantly, then you’d better look for another partner.
Requiring the most of your attention
Any single parent considers children to be his or her priority and at that stage, any other person would not matter that much. If your match is angry when you can’t leave your children with a babysitter and go out, that is a bad sign.
Some guys are selfish and do not give it a clue that you need to spend time with your children, cook for them, take them to school, and do all those things you do. You will never be happy with such a person, so it is better to end such a relationship.
On a single parent dating site, you can communicate with several people at a time and see who behaves like that even before meeting in reality.
Insisting to meet your children too soon
When being a single parent you consider dating again, only you should decide when to make your kids and your crush acquainted. Even if your match wants utmost happiness for you and your babies, insisting too hard to meet them isn’t very good.
This is not a very healthy behavior while everyone should be patient when dating a single parent and not push anyone. Keep in mind there are not very good people chasing single parents, such as kidnappers and various weirdos.
It, by no means, implies the person you are dating is like that. However, some extra cautions if you are forced to introduce your match to your children, would be necessary.
Ill-treating your kids
One of the most efficient single parent dating tips would be to pay attention to the way your partner is treating your babies. There are obvious red flags and recognizing them is your main duty.
Someone may not abuse your children physically but emotionally or verbally. If you noticed at least one of these three ways of abuse, run away from that person and protect your children from physical or emotional stress and traumas.
Your intuition is never wrong, and if something tells you this person is mistreating your children, verify it first and if that’s true — end this relationship the soonest.
Teaching you to parent
In case you have asked for a tip and didn’t like it it is one thing. Another case is when we do not ask for any parenting recommendation but are constantly told what we do wrong and how we have to proceed.
By the way, if your crush is teaching your kids what to do and how to behave it is not good, too, even if this person is a wonderful parent to his/her own children. You are the only parent to your children at that stage and you do not need anyone to teach you, even if you are a couple.
If you have asked for advice once and your date started to provide them all the time after that, that’s not healthy also. Such things might seem benign but you still need to focus your attention on them. In the future, everything will be worsened.
Your children aren’t comfortable around your date
Children are different, and when a single parent is dating someone new, they need to get used to it. Someone needs less time, others more. Give that time to them.
However, a huge red flag is when your kid is usually comfortable around other new people but constantly telling you he is not around your new crush. Try to talk to your child, find out what exactly is wrong and how to solve this.
If your kid refuses to meet and communicate with your new date, you should take their feelings into account, of course. You do not want to make your children unhappy, do you?
Having children of their own they do not see or take care of
This is a very good indication of what kind of person and parent your new crush is. If your partner has his own children but doesn’t see them, help, or participate in their lives — what can you expect from that person?
Try to find out why your date behaves so. One thing is if the ex-partner doesn’t allow it and by all means, prevents it. Another thing is when people simply do not want to. There is nothing to think about in that case. Tensions between ex-partners are not the reason to avoid participating in the lives of their children.
You and your children deserve the best
As a single parent, you may believe that you will never be dating again and catch the very first chance. This tactic is wrong and thousands of single parents join different dating sites and find their partners successfully.
If someone has ever told you that with your children, you will never have a happy personal life again, cut this person from your life. Single parents meet, get married and live a happy life together with their kids.
The only thing you should always remember is to always bear in mind the interests of your children. If someone requires you not to do it, this person isn’t worth dating you.